Loss of a life partner simultaneously entails another profound loss: The entity you were as a couple is also forever gone. This is why we sometimes feel like a "part" of us died, too. Loss of a sibling or parent, or even a pet can be excruciating. Divorce produces the same feelings of loss, to varying degrees, in both of the partners. Sometimes they can heal together and re-define their relationship, but more often they cannot. For the last four decades, our culture has grown familiar with the five stages of grief introduced by psychiatrist, Elizabeth Kubler-Ross. The stages are so familiar that when friends tell us, "It just takes time," we often lapse into a holding pattern to allow the stages to pass. Since the only thing that happens with the passage of time is the passage of time, we are stunned by how easily we dissolve into tears or become enraged over small things two, three, even several years after the loss. Loss that goes unacknowledged or unattended can be disabling. On the other hand, grief that is expressed and experienced has a potential for the kind of healing that can strengthen and enrich life. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, but there are ways to make your grieving more complete and more positive. You have a life to live. You deserve to live it fully. I will help you move in that direction.